Best Lines of Deadwood notes some of the best lines!

Season 1:

·      E.B. Farnum to Wild Bill Hickok: “Separate rooms, I’ll arrange that by tomorrow, but today I can’t fix it,… unless you kill a guest.”

·      Seth Bullock: “Any more gun play gets answered. You call the law in Sampson, you don’t get to call it off just cause you’re liquored up and popular on payday.”

·      Sol Star, offering business advice to Bullock.: “Comin’ out with your fly down might strike the wrong note.”

·      Jack McCall: “Should we shake hands or something, relieve the atmosphere. I mean how stupid do you think I am?”

Wild Bill Hickok: “I don’t know, I just met you.”

·      Wild Bill Hickok: “Was that you or me Montana?”

Seth Bullock: “My money’d be on you.”


Season 2:

·      Dan Dority: “Saves time travelin’ to the one destination, murder the three of ’em, ‘see how they like being Commissioners after they’re dead.”

Swearengen: “Bad news or tries against our interests is our sole communications from strangers, so let’s by all means plant poles across the land and festoon the c*cksuckers with wires to hurry the sorry word and blinker our judgments of motive.”

Dority: “Say the word, them f*cking poles are kindling.”

Swearengen: “You want a donkey’s attention, you bring a f*cking pole down between his ears.”

·      Tolliver: “And don’t the kid in all of us look forward to the new arrival. I still tingle at the bottom of my balls. Who could be coming? President Hayes? Maybe it’s jugglers, or face-painters.”

·      Swearengen: “It’s age impedes my stream, no f*cking fear of you.”

·      Swearengen: “I’ll handle my areas but there’s dimensions and f*cking angles I’m not expert at you would be, if you’d sheath your pr*ck long enough, resumed being the upright pain-in-the-balls that graced us all last summer.”

·      Tolliver: “Awful possibility is both men sustaining mortal injuries..But I’m rarely that f*cking lucky.”

·      Doc Cochran: “Tell Wu that drunk best not get by his pigs till I’ve had my way with the corpse.”

·      Swearengen: “Cow-eyed kid looking out from that coach. That’s what unmanned me.”

·      Alma Garret: “At it’s best this camp is forbidding to new arrivals..”

·      Tolliver: “And while you traveled with her, her husband the Sheriff was pickling his pr*ck in the c*nt-brine of another.”


Season 3:

·      HEARST: “I expect your practice includes whores.”

DOC COCHRAN: “And worse.”

·      ADAMS: “When he ain’t lying Al’s the most honorable man you’ll meet.”

·      TRIXIE: “I’m taking a stroll to the polls. One vote for Star buys a hand-job, repeaters get a suck.”

·      FARNUM: “I can’t engage him in further conversation! When I hear his voice I see the inside of his skull. Phantoms grin out at me leaking gruesome goo.”

SWEARENGEN: “Slide this under his door then.”

·      CY: “Go ahead now Janine and finish your latin lessons and your greek. The thrist this girl has for knowledge, she barely has time to suck a pr**k.”



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